On morning walks with Faye we look for the Statue of Liberty. Faye often travels with her binoculars so that when we spot the verdigris lady rising above New York Harbor she can adjust the dial and get a better look. Faye screams and points. The Statue of The Liberty, she chants. She’s jubilant. I’m proud.
As a child I had my own obsession with the statue. According to family myth, my New Yorker grandfather climbed to the crown of Lady Liberty as a child and carved his initials in its interior, making his mark alongside the scribbles of countless others. When I was ten or so, he told me to, “line up your nose with hers, and then look to the right.” I’ve searched without finding evidence of my grandfather’s boyhood vandalism, but it’s still a family story that I hold on to. The Statue of Liberty: a beacon of hope, a symbol of opportunity and safety and greatness, my grandfather’s initials etched mischievously into her steely interior.
But myths and symbols don’t tell the whole story. Twelve million immigrants passed through Ellis Island in the New York Harbor, seeking refuge and opportunity. Twelve and a half million African people were enslaved and shipped across the same waters these immigrants traveled. The indigenous people who first lived on this land and fished in these waters were systematically removed from it. This land of freedom and opportunity is also a land of violent, systemic racism. There are Americans who have fought those systems and there are Americans who have kept them firmly in place. This is all part of the American story, much as we might be ashamed to tell the whole tale.
So what do we tell our children? How do we talk about race and social justice with kids? As a white parent, I know I’ve been afraid that I’ll fumble the task. I’ve wondered whether talking about race will alert Faye to ideas she doesn’t yet have about identity and difference. This is wrong. If we’re not anti-racist, we’re part of the problem. We’ve got to talk about it.
This isn’t just my opinion. Peer-reviewed, academic research shows that taking a colorblind approach on matters of race with children does more harm than good. Talking openly about race in fact helps children to question the bias they are sure to encounter as they move through the world. Ignoring, glossing over, or shushing questions or observations about difference doesn’t make difference disappear. And because all children will encounter differences in race, size, gender expression, physical and intellectual ability, income, dress and custom as they move through life, we do them a disservice when we pretend these differences don’t exist. If we supply them with unbiased, honest, age-appropriate answers about (in)equity and (in)justice, they’ll know when they spot bias and prejudice—and they’ll know when to speak up against it. Still, like all parenting, these conversations can be hard. I’ve found that books help.
Below, some of my favorites along with recommendations from two of my favorite independent Brooklyn bookstores:
THE COLORS OF US, words and pictures by Karen Katz
Seven-year-old Lena and her mother observe the different colors of their friends and neighbors; a cheerfully illustrated introduction to the diversity of human skin tones.
WE MARCH, words and pictures by Shane W. Evans
A simple, straightforward look at the 1963 March on Washington and the power of peaceful protest.
LAST STOP ON MARKET STREET, words by Matt de la Pena, illustrations by Christian Robinson
One of Faye’s favorites, a story to remind folks of the power of teaching children about the world around them.
STAND UP AND SING, words by Susanna Reich, illustrations by Adam Gustavson
A little wordy for the littlest among us, but a wonderful story about using song to further activist goals.
From Maggie Pouncey, owner of Stories Bookstore*:
NELSON MANDELA, paintings and words by Kadir Nelson
“I really love picture books about change-makers because I think the only bearable way to talk to small children about atrocities human beings commit against one another is through hopeful, empowering stories of change.”
BLUE SKY, WHITE STARS, words by Sarvinder Naberhaus, paintings by Kadir Nelson
“It’s a simple, exquisite poem of a book, an ode to America, with stunning art, about all that connects us as a country, and it’s quite impossible to read these days without crying. But a good kind of crying!”
OF THEE I SING: A Letter to My Daughters, words by Barack Obama, illustrations by Loren Long
“Similarly moving/tear-jerking/hopeful is Barack Obama’s book…It really is written as a letter to Sasha and Malia, but also to all young Americans, and who says it better than Obama? He explores other great Americans (Georgia O’Keeffe, Jackie Robison) and the great American strengths—creativity, bravery, and more—they embodied.”
I DISSENT, words by Debbie Levvy, illustrations by Elizabeth Baddeley.
“We also are all crazy about the RBG picture book biography. I mean, what a great title, and that is the theme of the book— how throughout her whole life [Ruth Bader Ginsburg] stood up to voice her disagreement even against powerful adversaries, even when she was the only girl/woman for what seemed like miles around.”
*Stories also has an Activist Book Club, a monthly book subscription where each month an inspiring story arrives in your mailbox accompanied by a page of prompts for discussion, storytelling and art-making. Recent books have been Rad Women Worldwide, by Kate Schatz and Miriam Klein Stahl, and The Case for Loving, by Selina Alko and Sean Qualls.
From Amanda Bruns, children’s book buyer at Community Bookstore:
SKIN AGAIN, words by bell hooks, illustrations by Chris Raschka
“‘The skin I’m in is just a covering. It cannot tell my story.'”
THIS IS HOW WE DO IT, words and pictures by Matt Lamothe:
“There are lots of ways for a childhood to be.”
STRICTLY NO ELEPHANTS, words by Lisa Mantchev, illustrations by Taeeun Yoo:
“For echoing the generous words of Vivian Paley: ‘You can’t say you can’t play.'”
WE CAME TO AMERICA, words and pictures by Faith Ringgold:
“‘Our food, our fashion, and our art made America GREAT.'”
LIFE, words by Cynthia Rylant, illustrations by Brendan Wenzel:
“‘In every corner of the world, there is something to love. And something to protect.'”
ONE FAMILY, words by George Shannon, illustrations by Blanca Gomez
“There are lots of ways for a family to be.”
PEOPLE, words and pictures by Peter Spier:
“There are lots of ways for a human to be.”
SUBWAY SPARROW, words and pictures by Leyla Torres
“For working together to help friends in need.”
THEY ALL SAW A CAT, words and pictures by Brendan Wenzel
“For considering how perspective shapes what we see.”
WHY AM I ME?, Paige Britt, Selina Alko and Sean Qualls
(This book comes out on 8/29. If you’re in the area, Community Bookshop is celebrating the launch!)
“For thinking what it might be like to feel like someone else.”
If you’re a parent who feels like you could use more guidance on broaching race and social justice with kids—or anyone—I’ve also found these podcast episodes to be really enlightening:
If you’re looking for more resources on talking about race to kids specifically, this is an excellent site:
Raising Race Conscious Kids
If you’re grappling with how to fight white supremacy more generally, these articles, podcasts, and sites provide some helpful starting points: